Hello everyone!
Just in Cotonou for a Dentist appointment and wanted to send off some emails I'd typed up while I've had Danielle's (my postmate's) laptop on loan for the week while she's been at her IST (In Service Training) . Also since she's gone, I am border than usual, so have more time to write a more personal and quotidian email that doesn't try to squash 3 months of my life into one mass mailed letter.
So recent happenings with me: Since getting back from my holiday travels and IST I've been feverishly trying to get my house back in livable conditions-which means my exciting weekends as of late consist of consecutive days of cleaning and sweeping every square inch of my house that has been doused by red dust and sand from the Sahara desert Harmatton winds. This is all good and well and to be expected, but my accumulating hand blisters (result of overuse of my palm tree branch of a broom) are getting in the way of my laundry days. I've come to enjoy hand washing my clothes. Now that I have music to listen to its actually quite a relaxing and therapeutic activity. But not when having to submerse my broom blisters and hand sores in dirty, soapy water. So long dainty baby soft hands… C'est la vie en Afrique though right??
Other fun and exciting things I fill my weekends up with are gecko wars. I generally don't have a problem with them-as long as they keep to themselves and don't mess with me we're able to live a fairly peaceful coexistence-plus they eat all the bugs and spiders in my house so up until now they've been good friends of mine. But lately these little buggers have become quite cocky-trying to come onto my little porch in my presence as I attempt to stare them away as a nonviolent tactic to standing my ground. Truth is, they're starting to freak me out-there are just so many of them and they're so Big-they're like tiny dinosaurs-I'm serious! And lately, I've been increasingly concerned about them staging a coup to takeover my house and attack me in my sleep. So this morning one fell on my face and I flipped out, shrieking like a 5 year old who'd just seen her beloved puppy blown to smithereens. I dunno what my problem is-I mean, what kind of person is scared of the Geico spokesperson species?? So this evening I spent most of my time throwing stuff at geckos who kept trying to creep into my house in my presence. Maybe the reason I'm so grossed out by them recently has to do with the latest body count of them I found when I came back home from my travels. For some reason or another handfuls of geckos decided to make my house their last resting place-leaving me to pick up their soft, dried up remains. But that's not even the worst part. What's really gross about it all is that some of them had already started decomposing so their innards were getting all mushy and sticking to my already mysteriously (though not so much now) concrete floor. Sick. OK-sorry-this of all things may not be the kind of thing you actually signed up to read when you opened this email. But this being a typical evening for me, I'm very bored like I said, and want to take advantage of having the rarity of a computer at my disposal to type down the many bizarre reflections I make throughout my day. I think it's funny that I get news from all of you about work, social life, and domestic politics, and I send you emails about my ridiculous fears of a gecko coup and my current body count of dead things I've scraped off my floors.
So in between chucking inanimate objects at tiny dinosaur-like creatures in my yard, I realized that I had just passed my 6-months-since-being-here-postmark and began reflecting on what 2008 might be like and how I felt about the upcoming new year. The first thing that I was thinking was that this year will be unlike any other year in that it will be my 1st full year abroad by myself. I was also thinking about how surreal it is to be here for me still. Sometimes its "Oh-My-God-What-Have-I-Gotten-Myself-Into" kind of surrealism, but lately it's been more and more of the "I'm-Actually-Living-My-Dream-Job" surrealism. I'm thinking, I'm hoping at least, that I've gotten through the most difficult hurdles-the first 3 months at Post (in village) are supposedly the hardest according to the other PCV's in country. At this point I've already had it beaten into my head that Peace Corps West Africa isn't going to be anything remotely like any of the other Peace Corps experiences I've heard about (namely those in the more preferable, picturesque surroundings like Costa Rica, Vanuatu, or the Pacific Islands)-so I'm not expecting a huge turnaround of fun and spectacular events-and I'm fine with that. I didn't want your typical everyday tourist experience. But the first couple months of accepting that this very atypical place of choice to live would be inescapable for the next 2+ years was admittedly, a little jarring. But I think I've finally come around and gotten past the hardest phase of adjustment. I'm finding myself able to recall what lead me here in the first place and appreciate more and more things about my life here everyday. I remember all the times I'd sat in my classes or at home watching movies and reading books about different countries in Africa and all of the allure they held for me. I spent So much time daydreaming about doing something just like this-seeing and experiencing a drastically different culture first hand, connecting and having real relationships with the people living here, and being able to experience the hardships and literally see the problems people are up against instead of only being able to read about them. I remember how frustrated I was throughout college doing all these country studies that seemed so wasteful since we weren't actually able to do anything about the problems once we'd exhausted research finding out about them. Having such a devastating array of impoverished and unjustly dealt with societies unveiled to me and then not being able to have any outlet whatsoever to get involved and at least have the consolation of feeling like I could help, was about as tortuous to me as looking through fashion magazines here now (ironically). Even with my new found appreciation for Glamour magazine and America's consumer and technological convenience, I'm finally feeling the excitement of realizing that I'm really Here-doing exactly what I've wanted to do for so long. I'm sure I've written some pretty mournful letters and emails about missing life back at home-and I definitely do still have those moments, but despite those, I am finally realizing how amazingly lucky I am to be here and be doing what I'd been lusting after for so long now. It's such a relief to be released from the whole Grass-Is-Greener-On-The-Other-Side-Syndrome and to see this great opportunity for what its worth. That's not to say that it's all sunshine and smiles now-that would be quite an exaggeration-but I think it's safe to say that I've finally adapted to the rotation of physical discomfort and loneliness that for awhile I was afraid would pull me down. It's an exciting revelation for me to make-albeit a little embarrassing as I would've like this gratitude to have come more naturally and quickly for me, but I'm happy to be gaining better perspective about life here at any rate. So hopefully 2008 will bring continued optimism and better gecko control.
In the meantime, (between gecko fighting and palm tree branch sweeping) I've been perfecting my spider nest burning skills and have been brainstorming new defense tactics for ridding my home of the numerous critters that have begun to overrun it. Oh yeah, and there's the other tiny little thing that I suppose I'm here to do also-work. I'm hoping to get started on research with my International NGO soon too. Its still kind of tricky since I'm the only one in the country who's working for this NGO and everyone else is in the States, and incidentally this particular country doesn't have the best or most reliable communication resources, but I'm taking it a day at a time and staying busy with my local NGO while I wait to here from Project Bokonon.
Oh-side note-if for any reason you're t-shirt or gift shopping-I have some good friends in country-3 Americans from Florida who are doing this Independent documentary on child trafficking in Benin (which is a huge problem as Benin is both source, transit point, and target market for all of the child trafficking that is going on in West Africa). They are incredibly ambitious and hard working (all of them literally sold everything they owned to come here and start up this project) and have been remarkably successful with their project especially considering all of the cultural and language barriers they've had to break down within the last 4 months. So if you're in the market for a cool looking graphic designed (by one of the filmmakers) t shirt or gift for someone check out their website –www.unseenstories.com- and email them to order a shirt (I think $7 goes to the manufacturers American Apparel and the remaining $8 goes to fund this independently financed documentary). Sorry for the plug-just thought I'd throw it out there as an idea just in case though.
Ok-finally callin it quits for tonight. Hope you're all doing great and are well! I apologize for the boredom that generates these ridiculously long and introspective emails-I know you've got better things to do with your time-but since I don't, this is what I come up with! Love you all tons and hope to hear from yall too!
All my love,
Sunny
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
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2 comments:
Hey, I found your blog off of peacecorpsjournals.com and it looks like you are doing what I will be doing in Benin. I am leaving on July 1st for staging and will be in Benin July 4th. I can't wait! Thanks for writing down your experiences, now I know a little more about life over there. Take care and who knows, maybe I'll see you over there! My email is EricOSU@gmail.com if you have any advice! Bye!
Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Dieta, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://dieta-brasil.blogspot.com. A hug.
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